What are you afraid of giving up?

Me:  Why do you think you never made it big?

Him:  Music is a hard industry to succeed in. Especially in Nashville.

Me:  Do you think you were afraid of success?

Him:  Is that a thing?

Me:  Sure. Lots of people are but I think many don’t know it.

Him:  Why are people afraid?  Isn’t success what they want?

Me:  Sometimes their emotions are working below the surface and keep them stuck in the familiar, safe zone.

Him:  How do I know?

Me:  Think about what you’d be giving up if you made it big.

Him:  Okay.  (pause)  Are you afraid of success?

Me:  I have been, but I’m getting over it.

Him:  What are you afraid of giving up?

Me:  Freedom.

Him:  In what way?

Me:  The freedom to create, to have the time to create. It’s the same with relationships for me. I worry that if I’m living with someone I love I won’t have the time to myself that I need to think, write, alchemize and just go with my creative flow.

Him:  But lots of married people are successful.

Me:  Of course.  That’s how I know my fear is just that, and not a reality.

Him:  Why do you think you have that fear?

Me:  My mom basically gave up being an artist to be a wife and mother.  I never saw that you could have both a successful creative career and a husband and family.

Him:  That sucks.

Me:  Not at all.  I know the issue so I just keep telling myself that I can have both, that I don’t need to choose one over the other.  I have freedom now but if I was successful I’d have even more – money, choices… That’s where the ability to know what I want and say “no” to what I don’t want is crucial. If I start doing things that don’t fulfill me, then I lose my freedom.  So.  What are you afraid of giving up?

How Do You Feel?